Simple Home Living: 2/17/08

Friday, February 22, 2008

Chic and Shabby Ruffled Onesie

If these aren't just the cutest little ruffled onesies.....Too cute here.

Flirty Housewife Aprons

I still need to finish my aprons - but in the meantime, I'm enjoying seeing what other apron makers have done. Found Momomadeit's Flirty Housewife Aprons and I love them! Cute style and fabric. Hey, Mother's Day isn't too far away - why not pay her a visit and tell her I sent you.

Where's Lylah Going?

I'm so thankful for the different opportunites God gives for me (and Linda) to speak into the lives of women. In November we drove to Tucson and tommorrow we'll drive to Vineyard Community Church in Gilbert. Our topic at this women's breakfast will be on the importance of listening ~ really listening.

Listening is a fine art and to do it well takes practice along with a concerted effort to care enough about another person to allow the fruit of the spirit of self-control to override selfish desires of wanting to be the center of life. How well do you listen?

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Building Bridges - One Heart - Many Hands

The Art of Bridge Building - One Heart to Another Heart

Today I spent time with my friend Sadia. We had some girl time together. She got to meet Anita, Linda and Anne. We took a brisk walk through a garden and enjoyed a quick look at beauty, then we went to Nordstroms, then had a long lunch at Sauce.

I love Sadia. I carry her in my heart. She's from Pakistan and I'm enjoying taking time as we build bridges to each others hearts.

I am a Bridge Builder. My daughter and my son-in-law are Bridge Builders. This past weekend they drove the five hours or so to Rocky Point, Mexico. Michael and I spent the time with the grandkiddos.

Candace writes: Mark and I spent the long weekend down in Rocky Point, Mexico. Located off the Pacific Ocean, it's about 60 miles south of the Mexican border. Four days full of sunshine, white sand, and homemade Mexican tortillas. I should also add.... four days full of horrid smelling outhouses, tent camping (in overnight frrrreezing 38 degree temperatures), and primitive bathing options. To sum it up, a perfect weekend!We got to be part of about 96 people from our church, ages 6 to 70ish, who drove via caravan down to Mexico to build 11 x 22 foot homes for three extremely poor Mexican families. These families were living in box-shaped plywood homes with no access to water or electricity. Our teams built the homes in three days with lots of cement mixing, sawing, hammering and stuccoing. All without the use of any power tools. The locals are . . . read the rest of this AWESOME story here.

My grandkiddos Zane and Ivana are Bridge Builders. Yesterday, the kids and I took our little lunch to their neighborhood park. Two other little munchkins were there. It was so much fun to see how there were no barriers between four little children making an immediate connection to each other and then playing wildly for about an hour.

Get the picture:
Running up to me with this little guy Zane says, "Nana, this is my best friend." He didn't even know this little guys name let alone anything about him. The point: it didn't matter that he was dirty or of another culture group or that he didn't even know him. What mattered was - is that this little guy was now his "best" friend. What matters to you?

Ivana shared her lunch with her new "friend." This little girl who she kept calling "friend."

Cherry Pudding

My mom used to make this yummy pudding for breakfast. It's a Pennsylvania Dutch recipe called Cherry Pudding. It really isn't a pudding. It's more like a cake.

I love making and eating Cherry Pudding. My family loves when I make Cherry Pudding.

Recipe: Cherry Pudding—Serves 4-6
Combine: 2 1/4 c flour, 1 c sugar, 2 t baking powder and several dashes of salt. Mix 1 T butter (melt this), 1 c milk and 2 beaten eggs. Combine the dry indredients with the wet ones. Then dump a can (jar) of cherries (drained of juice) into the mixture. My picture shows you what kind of cherries to use. Bake this in a well greased 9X13 baking dish for 25 minutes at 375 degrees. Watch it that it doesn’t burn. The top should be a golden brown.

When it's still warm, put it in a bowl, pour milk on it then add a little bit of sugar. What I do next is call the King.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

A Plan to Resolve Conflicts in Marriage

Resolving Conflicts - This works for us.

Here’s a plan. Whenever a discussion or conflict needs to be addressed:

Pray, pray and pray. Ask God for clarity in your thoughts and with your feelings. You don’t want to speak out of “emotion.” You want to be clear about your concerns, your issues, your hurt or disappointment. You want to have already thought through (with his kind of language) what are the issues of concern. You must be specific, not nebulous. In my Coffee Talk book I have inserted a Wellspring Listening Wheel that is helpful to use in working through these sorts of issues.

State to your husband that you have an issue that you’d like to discuss.

Like Esther, approach him with wise timing. It’s best to pick your time wisely ~ avoid the dinner table and avoid hitting him as he walks in the door from work. But, don’t avoid the issue. Make sure you have his attention (eye contact) and simply, say something like, “Honey, I’d like to talk to you ~ I have a concern, struggle, issue, hurt (or whatever) that I’d like to sit down and talk about with you.” Then, say, “When would be a good time to talk.”

If he says, he doesn’t know when a good time would be, ask him, “When can you tell me what time is good for us, because I know you care about what I’m thinking.” I’d avoid saying what you are “feeling,” as some men truly don’t understand the “feelings” of a woman. Also, saying that you know he cares is speaking and believing the best.

Suggest a time if none is being made. Ask for a specific amount of time. You could say, “How about Thursday evening from 7 pm until 7:30 pm over coffee in the living room….or at the coffee shop.” You are creating the arena and inviting him in. You are giving a clear intent with a time limit. If there is not resolve in those 30 minutes, a new “contract” can be requested and then negotiated to continue the discussion so unity is reached.

State clearly what the issue is. A suggestion might be, “Honey, I’d like to talk to you on Thursday night about my concerns of how we spend our vacation, or the words you used in speaking to me, or the relationship with your mother…or the amount of time you spend on your hobby ….or…..…”

When you sit down to discuss the issue, use good listening skills. Don’t interrupt. Take responsibility and do use “I” messages. The “we” is over responsibility. The “you” is under responsibility.

Don’t use sarcasm, attacking, blaming. Don’t piggy-back issues. Stay with the issue at hand. Watch your tone of voice. Watch the level of your emotions. Avoid the “never” and “always” words. Also, avoid the, “Why don’t you….?” That is interpreted as, “Why don’t you, dummy?”

Be affirming in what he does do that is responsible and good.

Grab God’s grace ~ He will be there to help you.
Remember, your husband is not your issue nor is he your enemy. The issue is on the table—not between you.

Then after you resolve the conflict - take the 30 Day Sex Challenge!

30 Day Sex Challenge

Sex IS on the mind of some good women! Jess is continuing her very good Sex Talk with the next post: Being "Sexy" For Your Husband. Roses to you Jess!

And, get this ~ the AOL Love Coaches are just one more "proof" that sex is THE sizzling topic in bloggy world. Had to post what they've had to say here:

Thou Shalt Have Sex Every Day
By CAROLINE HOWARD, AOL

When debate turns to the value of marriage, attention normally goes to the religious sanctity of the union, the socio-economic benefits to the married adults and their children and even health pluses. Married couples tend to live longer, healthier lives and are typically less depressed or anxious than their single, divorced, or widowed counterparts.But one Ybor City, Fla, pastor has taken up the mantle of another marriage blessing. In an attempt to curb high divorce rates, Relevant Church head pastor Paul Wirth issued a challenge for his married congregants: Have sex every day for one month.

"Sometimes life gets in the way," Wirth told the Associated Press. "Our jobs get in the way. And that's no different for people who attend church."According to the National Center for Health Statistics, the rate of divorce in the U.S. is 3.6 divorces per 1,000 people; the rate peaked at 5.3 per 1,000 in 1981. Notably, divorce rates are highest in states where many conservative Christians live, including Arkansas and Mississippi, while the percentage dips in the more liberal Northeast and upper Midwest.

What accounts for the overall decline in divorce rates? Many experts attribute it to a combination of the rise in cohabitation, the older age of marriage, and the overall decline in the marriage rate -- a whopping 30 percent since the mid-1980s. Others factors in income and education levels.

Some, like Pastor Wirth, believe lower divorce rates somehow relates to higher sexual activitiy.

One recent online study by clinical sexologist Bob Berkowitz, PhD and his wife Susan Yager-Berkowitz, authors of 'He's Just Not Up for It Anymore,' however, found that the U.S. divorce rate is well below the nation's average of married couples in sexless marriages (couples having sex fewer than 10 times per year). And it said the most frequent reason couples stop regular lovemaking was 'unadventurous sex,' or a loss of enthusiasm or novelty.

Pastor Wirth's invitation does not extend to unmarried congregants.

Mrs. Fussypants gives you the quiz on "How You Know If You've Cut His Testicles Off."

I chime in here with my version of NOT emasculating your man. And my husband adds his two cents here - with what a husband needs most:

A F S

You'll have to go here to find out what AFS means.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Tuesday - Tackling IT

In bloggy world - Tuesday seems like a good day to TACKLE IT. The IT is the question. What is the IT?

The IT for me - is more decluttering and re-organization. Because I have a Simple Home motto - I'm motived! This morning I started, well because I tend to be random - I've started all over the place. Grin.

Got the bed made, pillows fluffed, laundry removed . . . and took a look at what else needs to go in our Sanctuary Master Bedroom. Removed - battery charger. A battery charger? Oh well. Check off the list.

I know what's for dinner - left over yummy turkey soup. Check off list.

Went to grandkiddo's bedroom - hmmmm . . . straightened and shifted books around - but this room will need more attention. It's NOT a TP (top priority for today).

Next - living room - grabbed pictures lingering around, removing some books and putting them in another free space in the bookshelf in the guest bedroom. Loved this post on those pesky bookshelves. Check off list. Need to remove CD's by piano - I'll finish that before the sun goes down.

Moving to the garage - re-evaluating MY space in the garage. Hmmm . . . looks like another garage sale pile is cumulating. Good. I'll find a girlfrind to join her. I store extra dishes (for holidays and other special occassions). Re-organized those. Check off list. Moved items around to be in "like - kind" shelves. Check off list.

Pause - make Green Tea. Bummer - spilled the whole cup of green tea on counter - got my Nourishing Traditions wet! Clean up and move forward - get another cup of green tea.

Rejoice and give thanks!

Monday, February 18, 2008

Ready to Go Out For Dinner? Check Restaurant Dot Com First

When Michael and I do go out to dinner (and these days with the Dave Ramsey $$ Freedom Plan) it's a treat. But coupons and discounts make it feel ever better. We sure like to get the deal.

So, here's a deal ~ beginning today, Restaurant.com gift certificates are 50% off! You can purchase $25.00 gift certificates that would normally sell for $10.00 for only $5.00! This offer is valid from February 15th through February 18th. 50% off at Restaurant.com. $25.00 Gift Certificates for $5.00 with code VOTE. Go '>here to get the deal.

Restaurant.com gift certificates make a great last minute gift that offers you freedom from shipping. You can buy, print and, send Restaurant.com gift certificates in minutes! Go '>here to get the deal.

Seems Like Sex is On a Few Wives Minds

Spring fever is in the air - a few (wives) moms are thinking (and posting) about SEX. Jess at Making it Home writes about being sexy for your husband and Fussypants writes: "Go ahead lock the bedroom door, forget your obsession with the size of your behind and have some fun. You are married after all, enjoy yourself. We all feel happier and more connected with regular lovin?"

Apparently regular lovin' will help keep the emotional connection strong and it will lengthen your husband's lifespan. I'll let you be the judge if you choose to share this research study with your other half.

"A study shows that men who have three or more orgasms a week are 50 percent less likely to die from coronary and the rest you can read here.

As the seasoned woman of these two (ahh . . hem) I would add these thoughts to consider:
1. Sex starts in the kitchen and the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Make soup and make cookies.
2. Treat him like a king. Create romantic at the table. I love what Amy did here.
3. Listen to him. Don't assume you know what this man is thinking or feeling or wants. Listen!
4. Make him your priority. I know this is a (at times) a task. You're tired, overwhelmed, emotionally spent and to make him the priority seems nuts. It's in those very moments that perhaps we need grab God's grace, slow down, and turn toward him.
5. Create sanctuary in your bedroom.
6. Attend to your feminine soul.
7. Reflect on why you married him and what it was that drew you to him.

So, I'd love your thoughts . . . what should 8, 9 and 10 be?

Related Posts
1. A Little Love Story
2. Some of the Things Michael and I Do For Fun
3. Steps to Sexual Intimacy
4. Marriage Matters

Meredith's Post on Yard Sales and Estate Sales

There are so many blogging mamas that I love to visit during a coffee break. Meredith at Like Merchant Ships is one of them. She has the . . . well . . . sweetest ideas. That's the idea I get when I visit - sweet. Her style . . . is just simply sweet. Anyway, a few days ago she posted her four fold approach to yard sale season here. LOVE it!

Baked Macaroni and Cheese

Here's another Oregonian Food Day (fabulous) recipe!

Baked Macaroni and Cheese This makes four 6-serving portions
This makes a huge amount of cheese sauce, and it can take a long time for that much sauce to thicken up. To make it easier, try dividing the amounts in half and making two separate batches. If you have two large pots and are good at multitasking, you can cook them at the same time.
3 pounds elbow macaroni
Olive oil, for the macaroni
3 pounds bulk mild Italian sausage
11/2 cups unsalted butter (3 sticks; divided)
6 cloves garlic, minced
1 tablespoon dry mustard
3/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
101/2 cups low-fat milk (1/2 gallon plus 21/2 cups)
51/4 cups low-sodium chicken broth (1 quart, plus 11/4 cups)
3 pounds colby cheese, shredded (about 10 cups)
2 pounds extra-sharp cheddar cheese, shredded (about 8 cups)
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
Tabasco sauce, to taste
3 cups fresh bread crumbs (about 12 slices sandwich bread), torn or whirled in a food processor
3 10-ounce packages frozen peas

To prep in advance: In two or three batches, depending on your pot size, cook macaroni in boiling salted water until almost tender but still firm to the bite. Drain. Put in a large bowl or pot. Toss with a tablespoon or so of olive oil to prevent sticking. Cool, cover and refrigerate up to one day.

Cook sausage in large skillet over medium-high heat, in batches if necessary; drain fat. Cool and refrigerate up to one day.

In a pot that will hold at least 1 gallon or in batches, melt 2 sticks plus 2 tablespoons butter over medium heat. Stir in the garlic, mustard and cayenne. Cook until fragrant, about 30 seconds. Stir in the flour and cook until golden, about 1 minute. Slowly whisk in the milk and broth. Bring to a simmer and cook, whisking often, until the mixture is slightly thickened and coats the back of a spoon, about 10 minutes.

Off the heat, whisk the colby and cheddar cheeses into the sauce until completely melted. Season with salt, pepper and Tabasco to taste. Cool and refrigerate up to two days.

To assemble:
Melt remaining 6 tablespoons butter and toss with the bread crumbs; set aside.
Combine the cooked macaroni and sausage with the cheese sauce. (Use a very large bowl or stockpot or divide the ingredients in half and do it in batches.) Stir in the peas. Pour the mixture into four 9-by-13-inch foil baking pans. Sprinkle the top with the buttered bread crumbs. Cover with foil and label with the contents and heating instructions. Freeze or refrigerate until ready to cook.

To serve:
If frozen, thaw macaroni in the refrigerator overnight. When you're ready to serve, preheat oven to 400 degrees. Leave foil on for first 10 minutes, then remove foil and bake 15 to 20 minutes more or until hot and bubbly in the center and top is golden brown. Let cool for 10 minutes before serving.

-- From Shannon Wheeler, FOODday intern

PER SERVING: calories: 953 (53% from fat); protein: 45.4 grams; total fat: 55.6 grams; saturated fat: 31.4 grams; cholesterol: 162 mg; sodium: 1,204 mg; carbohydrate: 66.3 grams; dietary fiber: 2 grams

Thai Ginger Chicken Soup

I subscribe to FOODday - out of Portland, OR and recently a few fantastic looking recipes were posted. Couldn't help but pass them on.

Thai Ginger Chicken Soup -makes 4 four serving portions
This recipe ran with their story on making large batch meals to freeze (hmmm...I like it already). It was one of the easiest to assembel becaue there was no pre-cooking required (hmmm....yeah, that's what I'm talkin' 'bout). If you plan to freeze this, wait and buy the fresh garnishes when you're ready to serve it.

3 - 14 oz cans unsweetened coconut milk
1 - 14 oz cans unsweetened lite coconut milk
8 - cups low-sodium chicken broth (2 quarts). Home made is best and here's my friend Stephanie from Keeper of the Home Blog - personal HOW TO make chicken broth.
4 pounds boneless, skinless chicken thighs, either cooked or uncooked, sliced into 1/1" chunks
1 4 " knob fresh giner, peeled and grated
1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons fish sauce
1 cup fresh lime juice (5 to 6 limes)
1/4 cup grated lime zest (4 to 5 limes)
1/2 cup thinly sliced green onion, including some tender green tops
1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro
2 cups thinly sliced sugar snap peas
2 10-ounce bags frozen corn kernels
Garnishes: 2 cups sliced fresh mushrooms, Thai red curry paste to taste, lime wedges, chopped fresh cilantro

To assemble:
Combine coconut milks, broth, chicken, ginger, fish sauce, lime juice, lime zest, green onion, cilantro, sugar snap peas and corn in a large pot. Divide mixture among 4 self-sealing 1-gallon freezer bags. Label with contents and reheating instructions, and freeze.

To serve:
Heat the soup in a pot over medium heat. Simmer until chicken is cooked through and flavors have melded. Stir in fresh sliced mushrooms. At the table, add curry paste to taste (start with 1/4 teaspoon or less per serving) and garnish with lime wedges and cilantro.

PER SERVING: calories: 355; protein: 27.8 grams; total fat: 19.6 grams; saturated fat: 6.8 grams; cholesterol: 91 mg; sodium: 987 mg; carbohydrate: 17.4 grams; dietary fiber: 1.6 grams

Designing for Life

I love color, design and time to create and re-create. If you're like me - sometimes you need some fresh ideas.

Recently I ran across - Kari and Kijsa, two sisters who specialize in creative decor, handpainted artwork, and vintage creations. You've got to go check there blog out here and as they say: join us as we share a laugh, an inspiration, and a fewfabulous finds. Then after you've perused their blog go to their web site here.

Philosopher, Musician, Husband, Father, Poppie, Friend, Pastor (and more) Michael Ledner

If you're a regular reader of The Lylah Blog - you know I really love to dote and brag on my husband.

He's not perfect by no means and we have our ups and downs but our love runs deep with passion for life, love, God, others and each other. You could say (grin, grin) that I'm really proud of my man. He challenges my mind and stretches my heart. I like that. Nothing is boring - trust me.

Anyway, while in Spain, Michael was asked by (74 year-old) Julian, "What is the meaning to life?"

The conversation didn't go anywhere in particular except that Michael started a study on: What is the Meaning of Life and the culmination of that study and response to Julian ended up being written up in Wikipedia (now how cool is that). Like I said, my husband is a philospher (which I understand is only 5% of the world's population).

Check this out. It's under the Religion, spirituality, mysticism and the meaning of life section and then under the Christian views of the meaning of life.

What else is cool is that W didn't edit too much of it.

Christian views of the meaning of life
Christians draw many of their beliefs from the Holy Bible. Christians and many other Abrahamic religions believe that loving God is the meaning of life. In order to achieve this one would ask for forgiveness of sins and receive God into his heart.

The Bible states that it is God "in whom we live and move and have our being" (Acts 17:28). The notion here is that they respond to a higher authority who will give their lives meaning and provide purpose through a relationship with the divine.

The Bible says that to fear God is the beginning of wisdom, and to depart from evil is the beginning of understanding (Job 28:28). The Bible also says, in Ecclesiastes 12:13 "Let us hear the conclusion of the whole matter: Fear God, and keep his commandments: for this is the whole duty of man". Read the rest here

Monday Ramblings

Wives partner with husbands in getting behind their vision. It's hard to do if a man doesn't have a vision for his life, his family and how to really live with the end in mind.

I'm fortunate that my husband has a vision. But honestly, it didn't get formulated very clearly until recently. One aspect of his vision for us is setting up guideposts to evalute our relationship. I feel safe in that.

He wrote this (and this isn't JUST for marriage) in December 2007:

CULTIVATING A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP
HEALTHY RELATIONSHIPS DON’T JUST HAPPEN

Healthy relationships don't just "happen." They take work. And anyone who does the work can discover and experience a healthy relationship. To sit back with demands, without making the effort to understand and do the work a healthy relationship demands, and then to get angry when the person doesn't measure up to demands (whether spoken or unspoken) is to guarantee a unhealthy relationship.

These are some steps for the one wanting to work toward a healthy relationship:

* COMMIT to do the work a healthy relationship demands
(understanding, assessing, accepting and appreciating/embracing,
and approaching with grace when there is a conflict)

[This usually works both ways, but, this applies to anyone who desires to have a relationship with a person. In other words, one person can be working the relationship in a healthy way and not the other. This only applies to one who is desiring a healthy relationship].

* UNDERSTAND (the reality of )human nature; that we are all flesh and have knee-jerk reactions, that we have tendencies to be selfish, proud, manipulative, and don't be so shocked when the one (to whom you're trying to cultivate this healthy relationship) has a "flesh surge."

* ASSESS a person’s values and maturity level. Takes time to understand what's important to that person (goals, desires, dreams) and also determine his/her strengths and weaknesses.

* ACCEPT a person's values and maturity level and thoroughly celebrates that person, appreciate and embrace him/her (in his/her heart and with appropriate expressions, whether in word, deed or touch)

* BELIEVE the best in the person and cultivate that attitude in prayer, thought, deed and word

* APPROACH WITH GRACE regarding any area that is hindering the relationship and seek to work out any hinderances guided by the Word of God and how to resolve conflict. This move to approach the person is driven by his/her original commitment to do the work a healthy demands.

--------------------------------------------------------

If you're married and need some extra help to understand your man - take a coffee break and watch Mark Unger's U-Tube on about how the man's brain works (it's full of boxes and the rule if - none of the boxes connect) and how the woman's brain works (it's all connected). It's so stinkin' funny and painfully TRUE!

Sunday, February 17, 2008

More Freebies - Free Birthday Treats - Listed By State

Who doesn't like a freebie and what I like even better is when someone tells me about the freebie (rather than searching for it). This site is great ~ Free Birthday Treats.

Companies all over the United States have FREE goodies just waiting for you! Even better, some of their FREE treats are good for your entire birthday month. Kids, adults, even pets can receive enticing birthday freebies. Check out the free stuff here.

I've got more freebie links here.