Wednesday, July 09, 2008

MOM Help 911 - Part 2

Welcome back to Part 2 of my new mini-series called MOM Help 911. For a review on Moms and anger issues go here. Part one is here.

I've been thinking about the many tasks of a mom and that the primary one is for moms to grow children. By this, I mean that a mom grows her children in three ways.

She models. She trains. She nurtures.

Today, I want to address the most important task and that is what she models. The most important thing a mom models is how she shows respect to their father – her husband. T

here’s nothing that will tear a home down faster than a mom undermining the authority of her husband. Respect for a husband/father is given – it’s not earned.

How does a mom model respect?
First, it’s got to come from the heart, if it’s not there find out why – perhaps there are some serious “dad” wounds that need to be addressed.

Second, don’t view your husband like your father. He’s not. And, seek to resolve conflicts in a biblical way.

Third ask for God to help you to honor your husband according to Ephesians 5:33.

Next, begin to think about ALL those things that you ARE thankful for in your husband. Count them and thank God out loud for them.

Then, begin to talk about those things that you are thankful for to your children. Do this for at least a week. Do it sincerely.

Practice speaking to your husband in a (sincere) gentle voice. Don’t yell. Don’t use a sing songy sarcastic voice – you know the one with the attitude!

Respect is so important. A mom needs to model respect for people and teach her childen how to have respect for other's personal property. I've got to be really honest. Nothing that bugs me more is when kids go to someone’s (my) house and they jump on the furniture or they get into things that aren’t theirs to get into. It's a mom's job to teach her children boundaries and respect. They must be taught that a NO means a NO – not a maybe – but a NO.

So, what are some ways that a mom undermines her husband's authority? Here's my little list:
1. She argues with her husband in front of her children.
2. She goes behind his back and does something for the children that she knows he clearly does NOT want done.
3. She says things like, "Don't tell Dad." Ahhhhhh
4. She talks about her husband - critically to the children or others.
5. She sulks or pouts when things don't go her way.
6. She complains that she can't do this or that because the family doesn't have enough money.

One final MOM Help is that IF your world revolves around your child – and IF your home is “child-centered” then I doubt you understand what it means to show respect to your husband. Go back here for some more biblical review. Hmmm . . .

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Mrs. Sidney said...

I sadly think my home has become more child centered then I would like to admitt. I really needed this post to get refocussed.


Anonymous said...

Thanks for sharing this!

Lylah said...

thanks for the comments girls ~ what I love about the truths of God is that His mercies are new every morning and His help is present and He teaches us...

glad i can be a part of His plan.