my day for tags thanks Angela!

Not sure why I'm so special, but I've gotten my second tag. I normally don't do this, but will for Angela like I did for Elizabeth :) Just one question, did you girls collaborate or something?


I am supposed to list 7 songs that are “shaping my summer” and then I think I'm supposed to tag a few other wonderful web women which I'll just go back to Elizabeth and daughter Jenni.


These always shape me and there are about 14 or so there besides Michael's You are My Hiding Place.


Just last week I've listened to over and over again with granddaughter Jillian: Walter Hawkins I'm Going Up Yonder. LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT. Gospel out here with Tramaine Hawkins on utube.


Sara Groves, Hiding Place is one that has ministered to me in the last four weeks. I've played it over and over again.


Candace has gotten me excited about God of This City (which I'm sure she'll post).

I'm enjoying some Cold Play which isn't particularly shaping anything and I'm also enjoying some on the romantic end A Nightgale Sang by Mindy Smith. Go HERE to listen ~ it loads very slowly, so be very patient.

So, I'm tagging Jenni and Elizabeth, Katie. Dorina who I am so very sure have tons of spare MOM time to do this :).....

my day for tags thanks Angela!

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/my-day-for-tags-thanks-angela.html

memed.....thanks Elizabeth

I've got some major jet lag going on, and yet, sweet and beautiful Elizabeth was so kind to "meme" me. I just hope I do this right!

I'm to post these rules:
Here's the official rules as they are to be posted:
1. Link to your tagger and post these rules on your blog.
2. Share 7 facts about yourself on your blog, some random, some weird.
3. Tag 7 people at the end of your post by leaving their names as well as links to their blogs.
4. Let them know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

7 Facts random (no problem, I tend to live in the random) or weird.
First fact:
I hired a tax from the Madrid Airport of which my only words were: si, bueno, bally, and an occasional bien to race against time (needing to catch the BA flight in less than an hour)...well, read the rest here.
Second fact:
I've been a pastor's wife for fifteen years or so and want to write a book: True Confessions of a Pastor's Wife (and all the crazy reasons why people leave your church)
Third fact:
I've spoken at a Women's Conference (for Qlosa Women) in Willovale, South Africa. It wasn't bush, but definitely rural. LOVED it. Loved seeing what hungry, desperate women do to hear truth.
Fourth fact:
I know two Somalie words (I won't spell them right....another fact) sook, sook (means wait) and mayhaway (means what is that).
Fifth fact:
I have six grandkiddos and one I've not seen yet and I whisper to him/her as much as I can, "Hi baby, your Nana loves you."
Sixth fact:
I'll steal Elizabeth's ... I LOVE La Femme Nikita and Michael does too. We'd actually watch it every Sunday night with another Pastor couple (they at their home and we at ours) and then we'd call each other in between commercials to talk about it and project what we'd think would happen.
Seventh fact:
One of my favorite family vacations (and I think the all of us except Candace would agree) was when we went to Maui and spent a week together. She was seven months preggers with Zane. It was awesome. Another favorite one was last year when we ended up having some big family time at Carlsbad, CA awesome time! Michael and I had some great couple time, working on our One Flesh Marriage Purpose Statement and writing down some of our history together and reminiscing through the times we've had and the good things we've learned.

Let's see who will I tag? Hmmmm...
Maria at the AZ Chica, Stephanie at The Keeper of the Home, Mrs. Q at Five in the Potter's Hand, Sheila at A Woman Found, Melonie at Momma and More, Miss Valorie Jane at Mom's of Twins, finally, the beautiful Refresh Mom at Refresh Moments!

memed.....thanks Elizabeth

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/memedthanks-elizabeth.html

10 quick tips to improve your listening skills

Relationships take a LOT of work. Good ones just don't happen and most of us aren't born with this natural skill or ability to relate well - we've got to LEARN how to.

Besides boundaries, listening is another important skill to learn. Listening can either strengthen or destroy a marriage. Need help? Go here.

Here's my Ten Quick Tips to Improve Your Listening Skills:

1. Look directly at the person who is speaking. Engage your mind in their words. Giving direct attention shows you care.

2. Identity what they are saying. Is it an opinion, an experience, a request, a desire, a concern, or are they asking a question.

3. Don’t interrupt. Speak only in turn. It’s rude to tramp on some ones thoughts and heart that is being spoken.

4. Think of what they are saying, not what you want to say. Mentally summarize their message.

5. When you sense emotion in you rising up ~ get control, keep it under control. Don’t get swept away in emotion. We get emotional when we are thinking their words are a personal attack. Just listen ~ it’s their words and their heart that is being expressed. Be thinking about what God is after in this situation.

6. Don’t change the subject. Give the person the Gift of Being Heard Out Completely. Don’t be in a rush. Being in the posture of listening is the posture of learning.

7. Certain words mean certain things to certain people.

8. Don’t judge what they are saying in terms of your experience ~ remember this is their story.

9. Listen to understand.

10. If you don’t under the meaning of a word, then ask.

If these aren't enough and you want more LISTENING help then go here. Or go here for whatever works.

10 quick tips to improve your listening skills

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/10-quick-tips-to-improve-your-listening.html

traveling tales of lylah - part 10 - Madrid, Iberia & Luggage

This morning I left San Sebastian, Spain - Basque Country. My seven year old granddaughter, Jillian, actually got up at 6 am to say goodbye to me. So sweet. Love that girl.

I flew Iberia, the ones that lost my luggage about 28 days ago. The flight to Madrid was uneventful. I forgot how much you have to walk through that airport, so it didn't take long to change from my new high heeled sandals (thanks to Iberia) into - flip flops. Smart decision.

So, I'm just sitting, hanging out, checking email and it's almost noon. My flight on British Airways says it's going to board at 13:15. I get this crazy idea. I go find out where the Iberia service desk is and I head there. I have time. I have lots of time. I talk to the nicest (for reals) woman and explain how her company (Iberia) lost my luggage and that I was trying to find it. She lets me know that they only store luggage for up to five days at her "special place" and I needed to go to the LZ Department. I told her I'd take a taxi there, and ask if she'd be so kind to write out directions for the driver. She did. And, I'm off. Running - not even sure how to get out of the airport, let alone find a taxi.

What am I thinking? Am I nuts? I goof up the little Spanish I do know by telling THEM that THEY don't speak Spanish (ask my daughter Jenni - she'll tell you).

YES! I am NUTS.

I flag down this very nice older taxi guy who doesn't speak a lick of English and we take off after I hand him my paper and point communicating that - that's where I MUST to go.

OK, I had momentary thoughts of - what if this guy is weird and I don't ever get back to the Terminal 4. What if I miss my flight? What if he doesn't really know where we're really wanting to go.

For another few mental moments and adrenaline dumps, I imagined that I was on the Great American Race. My taxi guy's into this with me - and we're off - to find Iberia's warehouse with 25,000 suitcases and mine will be there! The catch is - is that I need to be back at Madrid Airport Terminal 4 and through security and find my gate within 45 minutes. Yes!

The race against time is on! I am NUTS to do this - I say to myself . . . I can't believe I'm actually doing this NOW.


Here are is my "map" to find the lost luggage warehouse with Iberia. If you've lost your luggage with Iberia and are in Madrid want to go on an adventure then follow the map or email me for clearer directions.

The view from a speeding taxi guy's taxi in Madrid, Spain.

The HUGE, let me say VERY HUGE cargo warehouse for Iberia. We pulled up behind that white van and I'm really twitching. I not only see my taxi guy's meter twitching, but I'm looking at my watch and my time has just about run out and I think, "How in the world am I going to ever find my suitcase in that HUGE building." My next thought is . . . "this IS nuts!"

We go through the security required at this Iberia Cargo Center (where they take my passport and write it down), my taxi guy pulls into a spot, I run upstairs and into the building to the desk area. Fortunately, the woman speaks English however . . .

We leave this Iberia Cargo section and head over here . . .

. . . as she directs us to this building. Across the way - to this very large brown brick building where I'm told to go up the steps.

Somehow, I don't know how, but I did communicate this to my taxi guy - I suppose it's with a lot of pointing and nodding. And, we're off, the race against time continues. I think the only time I've had this adrenaline dump is when I married Michael and when I had babies.


I go inside and this gal doesn't speak English but she sees my processing luggage papers from Iberia and she points to the picture of the suitcase on the paper and leads me outside and around the corner and points to this . . .

car. That's where I NEED to go. Now, at this point, I just start running - in my flip flops. I don't communicate anything to my taxi guy.

Real stupid. I'm running and all I'm thinking is "What if my taxi guy takes off and my hand carry piece, my lap top, my handbag with my passport are in HIS taxi . . . great, Lylah - you're more than nuts - you're crazy!"

I just prayed and asked God for mercy. The other think that was happening is the ticker on my watch was going fast. It's like 12:45 and my flight has boarded and I'm no where near the airport, let alone racing through security in Madrid. Ahhh...just rehearsing this causes my heart to palpitate.

Other thoughts: my husband isn't going to see me tomorrow, my husband isn't going to be happy about this IF I miss my flight and have to reschedule everything, this will make some great blog fodder or at the very least a good story to tell my grandchildren who all prayed that my luggage would come because I'd been bringing some High School Musical stuff for Jillian's birthday.

This is where I need to go. And, I'd been told they stop working at 1 pm and it's almost 1pm so I buzz the buzzer - several times and slowly this guy . . .

. . . comes to the door with the biggest grin. . . and calmly leads me into the next room. At this point my taxi guy, who surely must think I am crazy, shows up. Phew. Thanks God. You're good.

This desk worker begins to ask me for something of which I have no clue what it is. I figure out that he wants some sort of verification that I am someone who wants to look at the luggage and he needs proof. I hand over my passport and he slooowly fills in my information.

I am frantic. I can't believe I'm actually in some warehouse in some unknown part of Madrid with some unknown taxi guy looking for a piece of luggage and my flight is going to take off and I am NOT near the airport let alone going through security.

Then, I'm ushered into another small waiting room where I get to meet a lovely (but upset) family from Nigeria. Their luggage had been missing the same amount of time as mine. What I found absolutely interesting was that they spoke Spanish!

The man's wife is ushered in and I must wait. Time is totally killing me now. This nice Nigerian guys says, "You will find your luggage." I say, "Really?" "Yes." Then I say, "Are you a man of faith?" To which he replies, "Yes."

Not sure what his faith was, because it was my turn to go look through about six different large rooms.

In the six (or so) large rooms there were rows of steel shelving units that went from floor to ceiling and most of the rows were filled from top to bottom with someone's luggage. The floors were filled with luggage too. I'm not sure WHAT kind of organizational system was there-if it was the first rooms the newest luggage or what. I'm not sure they knew either, because it all seemed pretty random.

After going through the first set of rooms, this really kind guy who spoke some pretty good English took me into the room I have pictured below. This room had these pull out lockers again with steel shelving units. I scanned each one and to no avail. I didn't get to see ALL the luggage spaces, but I can tell you that there are thousands.

It was a bit comforting, at least, that this guy communicated how "bad" he felt with the lost luggage. He kept saying that it's not good what has happened. Then he said something about wanting to "get credit" for showing me...and then it switched to "I will look for your luggage." HUH? He took my claim form, made a copy and told me he'd look for my luggage.

I snapped this as my taxi guy spun around to race me back to the Madrid airport.

We get to the airport and the horrible thing is - is that I don't have enough Euros to pay this guy.

I know. . . . I know - it's totally awful. He sees my panic and I'm pointing to his meter thinking that the 38 means that I owe 38 euros -which I have, but he's telling me - it's more. I pull out a 10 pound from England and he looks at it - looks at me and for some reason the mercy of God toward me is on this man and he shakes his head and opens the trunk and I'm grabbing everything . . .

. . . running like mad. I get through security NOT without a hitch. The little security chic decides that I have something in my carry on that needs to be evaluated. Can ya believe it? I sure couldn't. She goes through almost every thing in there. She pulls out my little baggie of underwear. Embarrasing! AHHHH...

I finally get through, but not after she gives me this very dirty look - and then I'm running . . . and praying that I somehow make it. I look on the big illuminated board that tells you your gate and my British Air/Iberia gate is the LAST one. It also says that my gate has closed! Can ya believe it?

I get to the gate, waving my hands, saying who knows what and the gate checkin guys says, "Calm down" in English no less. The gate had closed - but they let this poor luggage chasing woman on board.

For some reason the front section of the plane had three empty seats - I grabbed them and took a nap for much of the two hour flight to London.

Am I glad I had that experience? Yes.

Would I do it again? Yes. There was just something about leaving and NOT having the regret that I didn't try.

That's how this life is: don't leave it with any regrets . . . don't leave it with knots untied . . . or bridges burned.

traveling tales of lylah - part 10 - Madrid, Iberia & Luggage

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/traveling-tales-of-lylah-part-10-madrid.html

give a boy a pole

Watching boys when they don't know you're watching them can be more than an experience.

give a boy a pole

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/give-boy-pole.html

MOMS Help 911 - Five - Beauty Pauses for the Soul

When a mom is encouraged to REST, it can almost seem like a cruel joke. But, it's the thing - the discipline that somehow a mom MUST prioritize into her life. Because it's so important to understand the kind of REST I'm talking about- go REST here and then continue here.


Today, I want to share a few more ways a mom can REST through more Beauty Pause ideas. On Friday, I posted the Take 10 and Get Out Doors Beauty Pause.

Take 10 - and Discover what Touches Your Soul
What is a Beauty Pause - the thing that touches my soul and brings a REST to me might not be that to you. It's up to each woman to discover and begin to practice her own Beauty Pauses.

When Michael and I lived in Portland, Oregon, one of my Beauty Pauses was to drive downtown to the Goodwill Store. Upstairs at the store were two of my favorite rooms. One was the antique room. Lining it’s shelves were wonderful selections of old tea cups, unmatched saucers, and an occasional lovely tea pot ~ all priced very cheaply. I love to look at and touch pretty things.

It was a Beauty Pause for me to linger, looking at the china and taking time to select my two-dollar purchase. Today, I have many beautiful tea cups and saucers, and even a numbered tea pot, from those delightful Beauty Pauses. Even looking at them and remembering is a moment to pause and remember that Beauty Pause.

The other room at the Goodwill store contained books. Looking at books is another Beauty Pause for me. I especially love the adventure of finding a very old book. I can still remember the day I found an ancient, leather-bound copy of Goethe (a German poet) written in English.

As I carefully opened the inside page, I discovered that this particular book was presented to Julies Rosenfield by Mrs. Annie Shapiro on January 1, 1908. I purchased it for one dollar!

That rare find is still a memory Beauty Pause for me today. More than a third of our library books were obtained from my Beauty Pauses at the Goodwill store ~ all one—and two dollar books!

My Beauty Pauses
I absolutely love personally pampering. It, too, comes under the category of Beauty Pauses. When I take care of myself, I say to God, “God, You did a good job and I’m going to take care of the good job You did!”

Bubble baths, with candles lit and classical music playing softly, are Beauty Pauses for me. A bubble bath has a way of calming me and causing every ounce of stress to swirl right down the drain.

Music is very much a Beauty Pause. It is said to calm the savage beast. Music is an instrument of Restoring Beauty. All of King David’s psalms were songs put to music.

A Beauty Pause to Restore Beauty can be as simple as sitting on your porch in the dark silence of night and simply listening. It will take a bit of time to quiet your racing thoughts, but you can do it. You can quiet those thoughts so that your soul can listen. To what? To the heart of your Father. To hear Him tell you how much He delights in you, how dearly He loves you, and how He has special plans for your life.

Taking Sanctuary
Is it time to take sanctuary away as part of your Restoring Beauty habit? I "took sanctuary" away here.

Is there a day’s drive you can take where the concrete around you can be transformed into the beauty of nature? Is there a cabin to which you can go? Nature often speaks more loudly to the spirit than do those four confining walls.

In Elsie Neufield’s book Dancing in the Dark, she writes that beauty was put there to make the pain endurable. She says that the two must be inseparable.

That is life: beauty, pain, love, and grace. It is enough . . . seeking beauty, looking for it, raising our heads and eyes to it, putting ourselves in places of beauty: this is a creative response to pain. This is healing itself.

About music, Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Music takes us out of the actual and whispers to us dim secrets that startle our wonder as to who we are, and for what, whence, and whereto.”

Here are some Restoring Beauty thoughts for you to actually consider:
· What place does Restoring Beauty have in my life?
· What is my response to beauty?
· Where do I sense the need to begin to create Beauty Pauses so that Restoring Beauty to my soul can be realized?
· Where is that place that my spirit is refreshed?
· What keeps me from going to that place?
· Where is God in all this?
· What is God saying to me now?
· Do I have idols purchased with credit cards that need to be destroyed?

(If so, let your Creator God help you from this hindrance to Restoring Beauty.) More "beauty advice" is here.

MOMS Help 911 - Five - Beauty Pauses for the Soul

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/moms-help-911-five-beauty-pauses-for.html

organizing ideas for a boys room

Two weeks ago, Jenni and I took a trip to the Ikea in Bilboa, Spain. She was on the look out for some sort of an organizing - shelf type system for Simon's bedroom. I was on the look out for everything. I just LOVE that place. I took the liberty to snap away at different things that I thought were great organizing ideas and displays. I'll post them this next week.

This grandkiddo of mine is one of those very creative, geniuses who is VERY random. He LOVES all the little tiny pieces of Leggos and Bionicles that give a mind like his room for imagination. Unfortunately, a mom can find those pieces annoying. Helping this kind of kid become responsible and organized can be quite the challenge. This (below) unit is what Jenni found and it's perfect for Simon.

According to Titus 2: 3-5, it's a mother's responsibility to train her children. Part of that training includes learning to being respectful of people and property.

It's a must that children learn to be responsible and to take care of their "stuff" and learn how to do so - in a way that there is "a place for everything and everything in it's place."

Understanding HOW God wired your child will help them learn HOW to be responsible (and organized).

For example, my grandson, Simon is a random, creative and sanguine-ish type of kid. Jenni is using colored containers - to help him organize his "stuff."

Using colored containers is a great tool to help a child like Simon (sanguine-ish and random) learn to become more sequential and organized. Something else that helped when he was younger was drawing pictures on the boxes of what was supposed to go into the box.

organizing ideas for a boys room

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/organizing-ideas-for-boys-room.html

one last cafe con leche

I leave at 6 am for the San Sebastian, Spain airport then on to Madrid - where they lost my big black suitcase with my very cute red high heeled sandals and then on to London where I will stay the night in what's called a Yotel. You've got to check it out.

I took a little afternoon walk - down past the Onderretta Beach - to have a final cup of cafe con leche.
. . . this little birdie joined me and it reminded me of what Jesus said that God even provides for the sparrows. . . .
. . . and then my heart turned to thanks, because of all that God's created for me to richly - I say richly enjoy . . . and then . . .

. . . this caught my eye. Flowers growing out of the rocks. . . and then I thought of that saying, "bloom where you're planted" and I thought . . . don't just bloom - make a bouquet. . . .and then

. . . walking back through the tunnel - I had a beauty pause enjoying Mr. Music on his violin man - and it made me think (of course it did) of my own Mr. Music Man . . .

. . . .and the lovely reminder of even though I've been gone for four weeks - what makes me Centered - is that I am a woman who loves HOME and from there God has centered me.

one last cafe con leche

http://lylahledner.blogspot.com/2008/07/one-last-cafe-con-leche.html